Should've/Could've/Would've

To my should’ve/could’ve/would’ve:

I never expected us to fall apart like this

Or that I’d ever have to wonder how you’re doing

These days, I only see you if I reminisce

And wonder if “we” were worth pursuing

If our lives were pieces of string,

We would’ve been wrapped around each other endlessly

We danced along a thin line from strangers to best friends to an unspoken fling

Twirling safely in the friend zone but slowly dipping into intimacy

I suppose it’s my fault that we always remained in that almost lovers limbo

I was never really clear about how much you meant to me

How I meant every mispronounced “te amo” that gave me the nickname Gringo

And how I never stopped thinking about what we could be

We didn’t end fighting, spitting hate-fueled words at each other

There was no climax, no closure, no frenzy

You found another girl and my ego couldn’t recover

Pride flared up and I couldn’t express my envy

I couldn’t tell you that we were supposed to be together

So, I ran away and you didn’t chase after me

An emotional storm that our egos wouldn’t let us weather

And when the skies cleared, our unspoken devotion was reduced to debris

Who would’ve thought that we’d grow apart this much

That the pieces of string that once twisted together so tightly they were knotted,

Would have unraveled so completely that they longer even touch

Or that some great love stories could end before they even started

That our happiness would be reduced to fleeting memories

That our effortless conversations would become forced

That our special, secret bond could never be remedied

That the flame would go out, that you and I would run our course

Although it hurt, I realize our end was for the best

Not every story will have a happy ending

The hurt is gone, this love will remain unprofessed

Time cured all, our hearts don’t need any mending

To my first “almost love”, even if this poem is never read

Thank you for teaching me that we won’t always land on our feet

That sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts instead

And that the should’ve/could’ve/would’ves in life are bittersweet