Size 2

Thu, 02/27/2014 - 12:06 -- arss140

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The media and its responses

to little girls' pleas at night

hoping the answer will be right.

"You are beauty my dear child."

Mirrors lie,

TV hides the real women behind makeup and silkscreens.

Fake.

Not true but false.

You're not right you're the wrong

in the world.

Not trying to fit in and please the eye.

Not trying to cover up those thighs or that butt

that must be all fat since it looks too good to be true.

It's not, just real skin and shapely curves

with hurtful words written all over.

That they glued to her not size 2 self.

It's plenty of a number with room to spare.

Hidden under baggy clothes

dripping off her non-existent shoulders.

Ill-fitting garments

are all she can muster as she shrinks her waist and bust,

like someone once told her that she must

be thin to be loved

not judged.

Cherished while she dies inside.

All the innocence squeezed out

as the room for bones and muscle grows smaller

her heart gets harder.

Until it sputters and bursts within her chest

because even that couldn't hold her together.

I would change how girls react to their reflections.

With open arms instead of an arms race to

cut and slice the excess

or the absence of,

but to her it's all the same.

If only I could change the stereotypes.

Strip the measuring tape of power.

Down with the anarchy of numbers

ruling our lives until we can only count down

calories like a ticking time bomb.

No time for dessert.

Vomit tastes better coming up

but empty toilets are better than full ones.

So shut the fuck up voices.

Only noises now.

The tables are turning

as stomach acid is churning

a finally full feast of food

because I was able to change how I felt

as I ate without hate in a race

to grow big and strong.

I broke the scale with the alphabet spelled out,

"I love myself."

Who knew it would just shatter.

I win, she won, they ruled their lives again.

Free of chains of self-deprecation 

with little things getting recognized.

Someone paid attention.

She did.

She is awakened anew.

If I can change myself

than you too can be

not like Barbie.

But a real woman

with hopes and dreams

for a future

where all bodies are beauty.

Not just a size 2. 

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