A soldier wrote to his Mother

A soldier wrote to his Mother Whilst in a trench he’d lay And gave it to his mate To post the following day When his Mother got the letter She had just got out of bed So sitting in the kitchen This is what she read Life is really tough here It’s harder than people think Please send me some new draws As these are beginning to stink Thought I’d take this chance Before we start the fight To ask for Jam and a tin of Spam And a small tin of Marmite The cook here isn’t up to much He burns more than he cooks So if you could it would be good If you sent one of your cook books A bottle of brandy please That’s for my mate jack Then he can bribe the sergeant To get him of his back One last thing dear mother And this is for me alone Could you run down town with £300-00 And pay off my mobile phone © 2011 Pee Wee