Sometimes I think...

{Title: Sometimes I think...} Sometimes I think I was born backwards Waiting on a life I never had Dreaming for lost chances Reaching for former ambitions Repeating a mistake—a lesson too late learnt Grasping onto a future objective Clawing at innocence and play Retiring early and living belatedly Suffering consequences of undone actions Paralyzing fear and unattainable achievements Rewarded but unnecessary Sometimes I think of the sun and moon as lovers Pulling me from the depths of hell To the flowing rivers of ambrosia Enticing, scintillating Resurfacing spirits and attachments The flow and ebb of resentment Leaching through my body Blighting my core soul with unsolicited emotions Rejuvenating my senses and Showing my drive — passion Sometimes I think it’s better to never ask why It was not you, it’s I,—it was guilt Consuming me that pushed me Whispering temptations Notorious accusations Over the brink Falling down the valley of unknown Facing the strangers and the friends Sometimes I think it’s a sin The unwritten pledge of family A painful reminder of inadequacies A repeating tapestry that winds around the assembly Tighter and tighter Restricting transformation, emotions, and Denying the freedom of LOVE Sometimes I think I have vanished An unfair farewell, An undue adieu, I question what I meant to you, Lost in the depths, of deadly despair, You sucked out of me, My last gasp of retribution, Left here to die, I question how I, Could have ever thought I could think