The Spotlight Effect

Will It Ever stop? The pitter and patter that drives me insane, making me wish that I had a different name. The constant nagging and bragging that makes my eyes look as if they were sagging. My ID and my Super Ego acting as if they are the hero. The thoughts crashing and smashing, while everyone else continues laughing. The mess-ups, the break-ups, and the endless fear, that something tragic is very near. The psyching myself out to think that I have to shout. The over-thinking and over- doing. The flaming fire that fuels my yearning desire to be smart like others. The thought that I am never going to be on top but just another girl in the lot. The quizzes,the tests, and the lack of rest. The expectations and limitations that I face, which take away my grace. Jordan, sweetie, everything will be fine. Every- thing will be fine? Is that What I Heard? Perh- aps it was my imagination, humming like a little bird. I no longer wa- nt to thi- nk an- d thi- nk ab- out wh- at oth- ers ex- pe- ct. My Dear Friend, I no longer want to be a victim of - The Spotlight Effect.