Starry Night

I sit outside in the night alone. Looking to the sky for the lights that shine. Resting here my mind wonders from place to place. I try to make sense of how I became so impaired. After sitting for a while it all starts to blur together. The blur is caused by tears I didn’t realize I was shedding. Releasing all my thoughts into an angry blur. Each droplet is the loneliness I feel. They are the fear of life not turning out how I plan. The stars swirl as I let my feelings go; wondering if this is what Von Gough felt. I look to the little sparkles for some comfort and hope. Once I finally stop I continue to stare. I tell myself everything will be okay. The stars hold my secrets and my pain. The heavens are my diary and security blanket. I can let go without feeling ashamed, only if I am alone under a starry night sky.