Stuck Becoming Undone

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Three years, stuck.

I can't fathom why I thought it was luck,

because three years ago I thought it was love.

 

From the first day,

I knew you weren't going away.

You were captivating. My love for you gathering.

Everything about you was pulling me in.

 

Your love.

You were 6'3 a chocolate dream,That I conceived as perfection.

I didn't know you were going to be the death of me.

Mentally. Emotionally. Damn near physically.

I couldn't see, what needed to be seen.

That it could never be what I wanted it to be.

Happy. Loved. Envied.

 

I can't lie, you would have been a prize.

You were mine, and everyone knew that was me.

But it was never just me, it was supposed to be.

I was just one of the three.

I was going to give you the present of my true love.

I glad I knew love, that you weren't worth it

 

I realize it was just lust, not trust, no love.

There was never really an us, but only once.

I was your girl, but was I just your girl,

or just another one of your girls. 

 

Three years.

We fight , we make up, we argue, we laid up. 

Enough. Tired of being stuck.

I need to be undone.

 

Your Presence, Poison to me.

Now I can see, he isn't for me.

I'm glad I can leave, Graduation gave me the key.

I'm freed. Physically.

 

Mentally, I was still stuck. 

Even from far away you still held my heart.

I must look dumb, chasing something that never truly was

what i thought it was. Love.

It never was, I was a matter of trust.

I trusted lust disguised as love. and I got stuck.

 

Coming home from school, 

I didn't know what to do.

You told me you were trying,

but no, you were expecting a baby girl, 

She was supposed to be, ours 

but that's her daughter.

 

That was the last straw and I'm gone, 

Back to school, I'm moving on.

I'm done being stuck, your out of luck.

 

I may lose my breath when I think i see your face.

But i know it can never be the same.

 

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