Subconsciously Growing Up

growing up isn't something 

you realize you're doing.

you know those golden memories,

the ones you pull out on a rainy day;

of catching butterflies in the garden

and standing on the stool

your mother got you so you could

watch as she cooked spaghetti?

the memories that carry a golden hue,

that create a comfort in your chest

so strong

you feel b r e a t h l e s s.

the more you grow, 

the less golden memories you make.

you know you've grown when

you fall asleep on the couch,

and wake up there,

only to realize that you've gotten

too heavy to be carried to bed,

and when you no longer share

arguments with your parents,

but instead share their same confusing

point of view, which is no longer

confusing because you've grown

and now

you understand.

those gloden memories seem to creep

farther and farther away now,

don't they?

you know you've grown 

when you find yourself going back

to those golden memories

that you have saved 

for a rainy day.