I guess "surprised" is putting it mildly,
but I can't quite explain how I felt
when I found out my old roommate had died
by herself in the middle of the night.
She was only here for a month
before she left the school,
and I guess I knew she was unhappy,
but I never guessed what she would do.
She drove out to the woods
and walked amongst the trees
and ended her life
without a soul to see.
And I can't seem to stop crying,
imagining her that night,
feeling so hopeless
she stopped wanting to be alive
Now I'm sitting in my room
thinking of all I could've done
to make things better here
so she might not have gone.
And I know it's not my fault,
and I shouldn't carry this weight,
but I can't help the feeling
that I failed her in some way.