surveillance camera corner store

I hate when I don't feel close to you

because it so rarely happens that it knocks my world out of orbit

when it does

And, yes, ou're someone else's sun

but you're mere inches away from where I'm trapped in an ellipse beside you

but I just never seem to have the right timing, do I?

I hate that you affect me so much, I hate that the distance makes the loneliness hurt more

I hate that you sharpen every pain, I hate that you deepen every wound

i hate that you make me look pathetic, I hate that you kill my motivation 

I hate that I used to be a person six years ago (and I wonder if I hate that person more than I hate the current version of myself)

but most of all, I hate that it's not your fault 

not one bit, not in the least

you never asked for my whole heart, but I gave it willingly at every chance I got 

and now I have the audacity to ask for it back?

"Fat chance," the clock on the wall tells me in a cocky hushed whisper 

"It's coming up on midnight."