The sweet old lady

She gave me a lollipop.
The sweet old lady at work who always gives me advice and calls me "baby" and "love" stretched out her hand to me and gave me a lollipop while saying "come on you deserve it, you work so hard" how could I say no to her. I took with with a smile on my face while gladly thanking her. Such a sweet thing to do...

so sweet..yet so evil.

The lollipop shoved deep into the pocket of my work vest as I try to forget all about it but how could I when each time I bend down to pick up a box I feel the plastic stick jab my side like a silly reminder. The plastic stick connected to the calorie filled sugary ball, my biggest enemy that I try and try to ignore almost mocking me with each jab.

I tried...I ate it. It's just a lollipop right? Then why is my mind screaming at me with numbers and guilt? Why do I hate myself even more after eating it? My body filled with fear from the outcome it might bring. I know why but I know how to hide it, all people saw was a sweet old lady giving me a lollipop.