Take Your Marks

A sudden realization in the back of a subaru
A panic, driven by an anxiety I am clinically chained to
With all of the time I have been given and all of the love I have been given what have I done for myself?
What have I done on my own?

Practice begins, no introductions, no tutorials
Here I am in my brand new swimsuit and cap
Scared as all hell
Into the water I dive, surrounded by this choice to start anew

Out of breath
Cramping calves
Burning arms
And a smile on my face

A single length used to leave me incapacitated
And I think back, receiving a framed award
"Most Improved" tears welling
500 yards of pure joy
Pure pain, pulling through the thick and chilled water

They ask me why I do this to myself
That is it
I do this to myself
And that is what makes it worth it

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