tarnished for good

Everything you say dissolves away like spray, I can admit things between just aren't the same, I can't do this you know? These little games, it's almost embarrassing how your words always seem to fade away, is it me that you don't take serious? Sometimes I feel as if I have caught a glimpse of something I know can never be, deep down inside I'm beginning to feel envy, this was never supposed to be said out loud, maybe something's are better off up in the clouds, I don't want to talk to you anymore I think it's best if I were to just ignore , the emotions I feel inside it wouldn't matter to you anyways , you see I'm use to this every night write down a paragraph of how I feel inside but I don't send it, I feel somehow that will just end it the relationship we already have, and because I can't do it I know this can no longer last