The teachings of unrequited

The way I liked to think about it was

It was the first step of opening my eyes.

The first step into adulthood.

The first step into many steps that will make me who I am.

I tried to make many steps that led to greatness before I realized that the heaviness in my throat wouldn’t go away just by pushing my mind onto different topics

Or jumping into my work

Or cleaning for hours

Or writing poetry

Or doing sports

Or finding someone to take my mind off of him.

Or doing anything that would make me forget that I had gotten my heart broken.

The teachings of unrequited:

Don’t get close to people

Don’t fall in love 

Don’t let people in

Don’t let people in

Don’t get attached

Self realization finally seeped through

Once I was finally okay with myself,

Once I stopped blaming myself,

Once I was done crying over every little thing.

I learned that the hardest thing wasn’t the heart break,

But it was admitting I was heart broken.

The hardest part was admitting that I had fallen in love with him,

When he had not.

The hardest part was admitting that I wasn’t okay.

Those words did more for me than he ever had.

But yet he still taught me so many things.

He taught me to see what is right in front of me.

Don’t lie to yourself, 

Don’t try and make the situation seem better than it is because it will only be a long road of disappointment.

He taught me to never let anyone have that much power over you

To never let anyone control your emotions 

To never let the way you act be controlled by what you think he would think of you

To never waver from the true you over anyone,

Even someone you loved. 

He taught me that love will happen in the most inconvenient times

And there will be nothing you can do about it

But survive.

But unrequited love taught me more.

Not only things I can relay,

But things that just pass through

Into your body

Into your mind

That completely changes the way your mind works

And the way your body reacts.

To say that all the teachings had been positive 

Would be an extreme lie.

The teachings of unrequited:

Don’t be anything but yourself

Don’t care what others think because the only person that will ever truly have you is

You and the people that have always been there for you.

Don’t believe that everything is permanent,

That things will always get better.

Don’t judge the girl that keeps going back,

Because you did the same,

You went back when you knew you shouldn’t have

But you were in love.

And that is no different then anyone else.

The feeling in your throat,

This feeling of complete and utter disappointment,

And the slight urge to vomit once again,

Is completely normal.

Everyone will or have felt that feeling.

I learned from unrequited love that there wasn’t a problem with me,

And that I wasn’t the only one.