These days Im not the

These days Im not the same

so much darkness that surrounds me and I wonder if anyone in my life can truly relate

to how easy it was to numb the pain

to shut the world out

lose myself in the endless game

Its crazy that every place I went, I saw someone I knew

twisted sick but the white ghost is still what I choose

and everyone asking questions that were the same 

"whens enough enough?" "why you driving yourself insane?"

but I wasent feelin

I was chasin dragons while my soul the devil was stealin

he made the pain go away

he promised me love

man he promised me everything

that was not his intentions but he knew I'd come back day after day

and no I was afriad 

when I really should have been

I was so sick in the head

and the time I was chasin 

I sat here wastein

away the days

I had the time to change

and thats something I'll never get back

too busy searchin for something my life lacked

I was caught up in the moment 

thinking that shooting was the token 

to love and happiness 

but really what I was lackin

was the keys out of this nightmere in which I was trapped in

I spiraled quick

and word traveled fast

that I was a dope fiend bitch

but dispite the looks, stares, and empty prayers

it was not something I could eaily quit 

I wanted more

needed more

feind for more

but what the devil had in store

for me 

was a messed up life

stuck on repeat

and what was once a treat

brought me to my knees

begging for more

the fake love drove me crazy

sugar coated 

but man it was tastey

but I been feel differently lately.