This thing called love.

This thing called love.

What’s a girl must do to get loved properly?

I am loved properly

But it doesn’t seem like

Enough.

Are my expectations too high?

Is he the one for me?

Is he my soulmate?

Am I enough?

My therapist told me to be more patient,

More kind

More resilient

More open.

Am I enough?

What about him?

Why can’t he grow up?

Why over post on social media

Why act like a child when you’re

21.

Maybe I am too judgmental

I want things to be perfect

I plan

I pray

I react

I overthink.

I’m not enough.

I DUMP my trauma,

I blame him when he’s drunk

I say he acts like my father

I have “daddy” issues

Or at least that’s what they say. 

I’m sad

I miss him

I broke his heart for what?

A lesson?

A void?

A break for me to get closer to someone else?

It’s not enough.

I am stuck in something that I should’ve never done in the first place.

I feel like I am making it worse, and I am pulling him on a leash.

He loves me so much sometimes it’s

Too much.

I miss him why am I trying to prove a point, why can’t I go with the flow.

I am controlling, demanding, unappreciative of the love that’s standing right in front of me...

This thing called love makes my heart ache,

I am full of disappointment, but he has yet to disappoint me.

I must love through the good and bad

And once it turns bad

I run

Stay

Stay

Stay

Its ok, stop thinking so much.

He’s yours, I’m his

Let it be

Let it be

Let it be.

This thing called, love.