Things I Don't Understand

I’m bothered.

I’m bothered by the things I don’t understand, 

especially things about you.

I don't understand you on days when you pretend like you’re happy,

and living the perfect life with a perfect family,

then the next day you're mad at the world for not trying to cheer you up.

I don’t understand how you can talk to SO many guys at once,

with no shame at all, because you guys are “just friends”

I don’t understand how you can sit there and hate me for something I didn’t even do,

when I’ve forgiven you countless times,

for things that I would never do to you in a million years.

I don't understand how you can be so ignorant to think I would hurt you.

I don't understand that you know what he did to me,

how much it hurt and damaged me even after two years,

yet you can be with him, 

and not have one problem with it.

I don't understand how you can try to ruin the one good thing in my life before it even started,

because you're pissed at me for an imaginary back stabbing.
But the thing I don’t get the most,

is how all it took was one rumor,

and after 8 years of me backing you up,

being by your side no matter what,

and trying to be the best friend I could be,

you left me.

So please, 

make me understand. 

Because, I don’t know what I want from you anymore.