Thought Trap

Why is he staring? Staring at me?

Does it look like I'm glaring? 

I'm just clarifying.

I'm just noticing what I say or what I don't, 

Too much or not enough, 

All clouding up me like a smoke puff.

Puff, puff, breath in and out.

Still caged and closed in, Can't shout

Scream and give up, look for an answer. 

Always looking, searching. 

Find an answer, find a new question. 

New worry, New concern.

It's not something I can learn, 

to relax and worry less.

Constantly feeling like a broken mess. 

I can't calm down, or lay back. 

If I even try new thoughts will attack, 

old ones will relapse. 

Lets replay yesterday or look into the future. 

Why wait with today when tomorrow I might disappear, 

Get fired, ran over. 

Why am I so selfish, always thinking of me?

when something horrible could be happening to a friend, or family?

Should I save them or me?

Do they notice my thoughts?

Think I'm a freak for thinking and thinking, 

over thinking thinking

Help this isn't me.

Never stopping anxiety.