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Time machine for me.


Dear Past Me,

 

I'm sorry. 

I'm so incredibly sorry

For what you went through,

For how you were treated. 

You should have never accepted 

What they were giving you.

You deserved so much more than that.

You showed yourself 

To horny boys

Hoping that would do it,

That would make them love you. 

 

I hate to say it but it's the truth;

You were so stupid for thinking

That you didn't deserve anythng 

Better than that.

 

Because you did!

 

You deserved so much more than that.

And it breaks my heart so much

To look back 

And see you hidden on your bed

Crying yourself to sleep every night,

Thinking that you would never ever

Find someone

Who could love you.

 

How could you ever feel so worthless?

 

I wish,

I just wish

That you could've met someone 

Like me

I wish I could go back 

And hug you so tight

And tell you,

"Put down the blade,

Don't pierce your beautiful skin,

Don't do this to yourself.

You're beautiful.

Please don't do this to yourself. 

I love you. 

And that's all you need right now. 

You need to love yourself, darling. 

You don't need those stupid boys

To feel beautiful and loved.

It doesn't last long anyway."

 

It's now two thousand eighteen,

Let me tell you

What you are like now,

You know what your worth is, 

You know that you will meet someone 

Who will love you 

For exactly who you are on the inside. 

You are confident,

People can see it in the way you walk

Down the halls.

 

Your scars, 

They are reminders

Of who you were,

Of how hopeless you were, 

How worthless you felt.

And how you will never go back 

To feeling that way.

They show you how to never treat yourself again,

And how to never accept anything less

Than you deserve.

 

You are amazingly extravagant.

 

I'm sorry that I couldn't have found this out sooner,

I'm so sorry. 

 

So, this letter here,

that your holding in your hands,

It's an apology,

Along with how you are now. 

 

When you see this,

I hope it gives you hope.

I love you.

 

Sincerely,

Adaly

 

 

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