tiresome

i do not wish to spend the rest of my existence resenting you,

it is so exhausting to harbour such hatred,

i wish i could trust you again yet i tense at the mere mention or slip of your name.

i suppose i hate feeling angry, not at you but at myself,

for allowing this anger to intoxicate my emotions and taint my body.

it was easier to love you obliviously,

naivety filled to the brim.

i’m not the person i used to be,

i’m becoming someone i am not.

i wish i never met you.