Trust

Why is it so difficult to trust You with my life? 

To hand over the keys, to physically pry my tight fingers

Away from the controls midflight. 

You, knowing end from the beginning, knowing which way the wind will blow, 

Why is it so hard to relinquish the dreams that lie buried untold

Deep in my soul 

To You, 

Placing them one at a time in Your outstretched hand, 

Closing my eyes and jumping out of a plane in the dark, 

Not knowing beforehand if the parahute will open. 

You promised me a hope and a future, 

But what if I crashland?

I want to believe You'll be true to Your word, 

that You'll whisk me away on an incredible journey, 

Eternal, beyond my feeble imagination's limitations, 

From the morning of creation, You've been chasing Your nation

Begging us in frustration to let You enter the situation

Pleading for reconciliation from the sin that entangled and estranged us, 

Cracking our relationship

Every time we do, You come through, always true to Your word

Never have You disappointed, 

You annointed shepeherds as kings, appointed murderers to bring

Us back to the promised land

You put a harlot in Your ancestry, 

Your hand guided history

Made a mess of our enemies

Your every command brought victory

And then, 

You came Yourself

Brought the sick back to health, the dead back to life

Ended strife, rendered the impossible a trifle

You gave me YOUR LIFE! 

And all I can do is asj, 

Why?

 

Why do I clutch my grimy ribbons 

While You're offering me a ballgown of silk. 

I cling to the empty cup You're longing to fill

If I would just allow my walls to fall.

Why is it so hard, after all of this,

To trust You with my life, to surrender?

To let You onto the set as the director, instead of an extra?

The answer is that I am weak.

I forget the way You've led in past, 

Unstead, I get upset when Your way's different than I expected or asked,

I get frustrated when a door slams in my face, 

Keep chasing what I wanted in the first place

Pounding at the lock instead of looking up to see the window.

I forget that Your scarred hands also held the stars

Before You scattered them across the velvet sky, 

You're the one who made their silver light, 

You're the only source of true joy and light

On this lonely planet

And I take it for granted that You've already given me everything

Paid the highest ransom price

Because it all came down to You vs. sin, and I was the prize, 

You traded Your life for mine, 

The brightest star for my jaded, estranged heart.

I don't deserve Your grace, 

I'm not worthy of the place you've reserved for me. 

Remind me of Your consistency, when I forget,

When I doubt You'll catch me, carry me, 

Remind me of the tiny place I occupy in history,

and how You love me, despite. 

This poem is about: 
Me
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: 

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