truth

     The truth is I never know when I am happy

I hold my head up high so the tears don’t fall down my eyes

People see me and think I’m special, they see something in me I don’t see in myself 

Is it the way that I walk, a smile on my face skipping as if I was an innocent child 

Or is it as simple as me not allowing them to see 

the truth

Yes the truth, a distasteful thing in the back of my throat hard to swallow like a rock

The truth, the truth is I’m not happy in fact I’m angry, I’m hurt, I’m searching for something better

When I’m alone in my room, sometimes I think the truth is, I will turn out like them

Those people, the two people who are supposed to squeeze me until I’m about to burst full of the warmth of their love 

Warmth and love I never got the same love stolen from me by their inner demons 

Yup the truth, the truth that I hate so much 

I’ve learned to tie my shoes, drive a car, and now on my way to finish high school without those people

It hurts 

As painful as a blade being pushed into my heart

And now the truth hovers over me like a dark cloud blowing its music into my head singing the real truth that the beginning of my story is almost done and they didn’t help write it