Tube Socks At The End Of The Rainbow

The trees walk around all the time.

but we...stay still.

Waiting,

breathing,

breathing heavily,

panting,

suffocating.

We don't walk the streets anymore.

We stay hidden in the bushes.

The bushes that rot in a day.

The bushes that leave us on a map:

wondering,

hyper ventilating,

where to go next,

no,

not where to go next,

how to get there.

But this...

this is life.

Life may leave you waiting,

breathing,

breathing heavily,

panting,

suffocating.

Life may leave you and run away

at the biggest Ding Dong Ditch

that you will ever have!

But this...

this isn't life.

This is a life.

A life you choose.

Yes.

Yes, life is bigger than us all.

Bigger than you can even imagine.

From the crust on the earth,

to the highest mountain in the sky,

and to the lowest trench at the bottom of the ocean.

It is bigger than any of you.

No, 

walking,

breathing,

running,

breathing heavily,

sprinting,

panting,

tripping over the tiniest cracks in the middle of the 

night...

suffocating.

And while we can't deny

that we miss the warmth of a family

lash out during cards

because we swear it was FATE!

When we see the disgust in their eyes...

The disgust that brought to yelling about

things we do that are morally wrong.

When to admit...

YES!

I fucked up.

I'm the one who left you screaming,

falling,

crawling,

dragging yourself to the end of the day

to make sure I'm okay.

Even though you're on the edge.

Edge of locking me up.

Become the reason I won't see daylight,

ever again.

While we can't deny those things...

life will fall back into place.

Remind you of what to really not to deny.

That people change,

we

become our own person,

we

get distant,

we 

start to hate eachother,

it's all of a sudden a contest.

Who can kick the kickball the furthest,

to who has the nicest car,

who can take more shots of vodka without pouring 

out their guts,

to who makes the most money,

and who lives the longest.

While we get mixed up in that contest...

that contest that we all signed up for.

We start to forget to stop denying the things

that matter most.

That my hands are getting old,

but my guardians hands are getting older.

That we crave their touch more than

anybody else's in this life we live.

This life we choose to live.

That as our family is slowly dying out:

I'm speeding up and creating a family of my own.

To bring someone in this world and to show them the

way.

No,

not the way we took.

The way they should take.

Don't go down that path.

The path that left my generation

hiding in the bushes to rot away in a day.

A path of running and regrets.

Wanting to go back to the future

because we lost that "big" contest.

A path full of denying and not realizing.

Show the path full of footsteps that take a struggle,

but never a fall.

That never started off with waiting and ending in

becoming things I told myself I would never be.

A path that won't leave them

breathing,

breathing heavily,

panting,

suffocating.