Like a Turning Coin

It hurts until it stops, but there's no way to know when that is. Because everytime it starts to feel like things are going right, it's like the coin is flipped and you can't get it to turn back to the side where you were finally okay. It would make it all too easy if the universe let the cards deal in your favor because the dealer is a sick fuck who doesn't seem to give a damn about more then a handful of players. Every goddamn day is played by the flip of a fucking coin and it's seemingly almost never in your favor no matter how much you try to make yourself feel better like the sky isn't falling on you and like the world isn't sitting on your hunched shoulders that already bear the weight of countless unmet expectations set for you by the days you were feeling like yourself.