Two Sides, One Coin

Dear other me,

I know you hear me

as I cry into the pillow

I know you see me

when I glance at my broken reflection

The numbness, it pains,

it's worse than a knife

The tears, exhausted,

I’ve used them all up

I want you to know

I’m not afraid anymore

I still hear your voice, yes,

but it’s only white noise

The darkness you brought,

the anxiety with which I suffered,

the depression that welcomed only Death,

the fear that I’d only be alone

You are nothing

I'm in control

You can’t hurt me anymore

I'm controlling these shaking hands

There are others

You tried to feed me lies

I'm still standing,

and they're all still by my side 

Your lies, deceit,

all that you wrought

Only now I realize what you are

and what you’re not

You are a coward

You are not any smarter

You are a liar

You are not my protector

You are an assassin

You are not good at your job

You are my demon

You are not me