ugh

by Keybob

December 3, 2024

God your energy is contagious

I cant stop fucking smiling and i hate it

Do you ever wish that maybe you had said something sooner

Because i do

I wish i had the rest of my life just to sit down in your ratty car and talk to you

I want to do donuts in a parking garage with you

I want to piss people off with you

I want to scream our favorite songs together untill my lungs hurt

You bruised your rib

I want you to let me take care of me

I want you to let me make you tea like i used to

Is your password still the same?

Did you tell anyone else?

Do you think we can ever be the same?

Something wrong with this poem?

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Comments (1)

cecilymockDec 4, 2024

<p><span style="font-family: "DM Sans", sans-serif; font-size: 18px;">Your breathless, urgent style reminds me of Frank O'Hara's "Lunch Poems," particularly in how you capture the electric energy of infatuation through specific, intimate details like "your ratty car" and shared passwords. The way you alternate between declarations of desire and vulnerable questions creates a beautiful tension, similar to how Anne Carson explores love and longing in "The Beauty of the Husband." Your use of casual, conversational language combined with deep emotional yearning ("I want you to let me take care of me") echoes Ada Limón's ability to make everyday moments feel transcendent. The progression from rebellious joy ("do donuts in a parking garage") to tender care ("make you tea like i used to") shows sophisticated emotional range - keep nurturing this authentic voice that captures both the exhilaration and uncertainty of love.</span></p>