Unadulterated Self-Analysis

Fear and joy go hand in hand

Resent for the other is not what I intend

For both can lead to either's path

And why the frightening can make me laugh

Morality is a skewed philosophy

With the obvious laws to abide by, I see

Yet people will tell me how wrong I am

I do not consider myself of the damned

Human nature disgust me to no dying end

The duality of which one cannot mend

While my views may conflict with how I can be

It is not I who commits unnending hypocrisy

Admittedly I could be an agent for peace

If mankind were to take a moment to cease

Claiming charity and tolerance in their new horrors

And realize the sky is not just one color

I create the illusion that I see beyond 

The spectrum that man has held to for so long

Yet constantly I'm reminded to being wrong

Reminded omnipotence takes no place in their song

Wise mens' words are shut down by those louder

Like Christ, Syddartha, they must be the martyr

My ignorance may surpass my limited wisdom

Yet fools will designate me into society's schism

My belief in the world that cannot be seen

Has conflicted with scholars of high esteem

Yet what I know of what we can see

Will not remove us from scientific harmony

I've tried to go the way of tragedy

Of Thompson, Van Gogh, and Hemingway before me

But false hope life had in its final goodbye

For not even by my own hand shall I be able to die

You can claim peace, love,  and understanding

But know that I will find you to be lying

You can try and find within me a muse

But all there will be is a formerly-lit fuse

Pretend to have knowledge and reassurance

In what are my sins and reasons for repentance

Interpret my words in the hope we're the same

But know it a lie, disguised in a name