understanding

the worst part about understanding yourself is watching yourself repeat the same mistakes same walls shattered and battered same question whether you truely understand or just tell yourself you do because it’s easier to believe you’ve grown than to admit you’ve just gotten better at explaining your patterns better at naming them than breaking them you start to recognize the signs the tone shifts the moments before everything tilts and still you walk into them like familiarity feels safer knowing the ending hurts less than not knowing what comes next so you stand there aware watching yourself make the same decisions hearing the same thoughts justifying the same outcomes and the worst part isn’t that you don’t know better it’s that you do and somehow that still isn’t enough to stop you.