Undesirable Men

There were two men

Pirithous and Theseus

Known around town

As sexual deviants.

 

Young and restless

At the age of twenty-three,

Always drinking

And forever so carefree.

 

One fateful night

While out drinking,

The two young men

Were talking without thinking.

 

They talked about

Some attractive women

When Pirithous 

Made an awful decision.

 

Pirithous declared,

With no small amount of bravery,

That he could date

The lovely Persephone.

 

This bravado

Astounded Theseus,

For no one would say

Something so devious.

 

For anyone else

Would have been concerned

If what he said was discovered

By Persephone’s husband.

 

Hades mostly keeps to himself,

His dog and wife.

He’s a simple man 

With a quiet life.

 

He’s rarely angry

So imagine the news 

That astonished everyone

When they heard what happened to Zeus.

 

Zeus had come for a visit

But had been pretty handsy

Whenever in the presence 

Of lovely Persephone.

 

That hadn’t last long

And Hades’ fury was unleashed

Upon his brother,

Causing him to retreat.

 

The outrage was overheard

By the neighborhood

And from this rumors

Began to grow.

 

Some say Hades

Confronted the man

With a large knife

And away Zeus ran. 

 

Others claim Hades

Had beaten Zeus

And that his brother had barely

Survived the abuse. 

 

Whatever the reason

People were then careful

When talking about Persephone

To say nothing disrespectful. 

 

But Pirithous and Theseus

Simply laughed off his comment,

Not noticing

The eavesdropping man present.

 

A few days later

After chatting with some ladies

The two men were met with

A calm-looking Hades.

 

He approached them

And started a conversation,

And then gave the men

A dinner invitation.

 

The two young men

Didn’t suspect anything.

It never occurred to them

Hades was up to something.

 

Pirithous grinned.

He was more than just happy,

As this would mean

A night with Persephone.

 

So that same night

Pirithous and Theseus

Went to the house

And saw the food in surplus.

 

All four sat down

But Pirithous only 

Kept his gaze

Upon the lovely Persephone.

 

The lady is truly 

A sight to behold,

With her shiny blonde locks

And green eyes so bold. 

 

It’s no wonder

Hades is so possessive

And why when people flirt

He gets aggressive. 

 

While at the dinner

The men had a great time.

Never aware

Of Hades’ plan in the meantime.

 

A few hours had passed

When to bed Persephone went

Leaving the guests

With only Hades present.

 

Their host then changed

From friendly to serious

And the look in his eyes

Made his guests slightly nervous.

 

Hades started to speak,

His voice was quite even.

The guests were filled with dread.

Of that they were certain.

 

“Just days ago

I overheard you talking

About my wife

And couldn’t help but hearing

 

That Pirithous,

You said with such confidence,

That you could date my wife,

Which is just complete nonsense.”

 

Hades left and came back

With something grasped in his hand.

Whatever it was,

The two didn’t feel so grand.

 

He sat back down

And his guests wanted to run

When Hades placed on the table

A small handgun.

 

The men’s eyes widened

And their hearts beat faster.

The night had undeniably

Become a disaster.

 

“You would be wise

To stay away from my wife.

Or you can pursue her,

If you don’t value your life.”

 

The men shook in their seats.

Their hearts were thumping.

But they dared not move or argue,

Lest Hades start shooting.

 

“Are we clear?”

Hades asked Pirithous.

The man nodded his head

And made no fuss.

 

“Now leave my house

And you two men

Better not go near my wife

Ever again.”

 

The two men then left

In the blink of an eye,

Frightful that Hades

Might change his mind.

 

They didn’t stop running

Till they reached their house.

Pirithous wouldn’t pursue Persephone.

Of that they had no doubts.

 

Hades smiled

And put back his gun.

It had been useful

In getting the job done.

 

After that

He headed to bed.

He was proud to keep his wife safe

From undesirable men.

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