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It comes suddenly

Like the first clap of thunder

I’m not expecting it

One minute I’m smiling

Laughing and joyful

The next, something happens

It’s hard to explain

I can’t control it

My body is to blame

Or maybe genetics

Mom suffers too

I’ve seen her pop those

Pills like they’re vitamin chews

One after another

Followed by a drink and puff

So she can get to sleep

I don’t want this disease

Please make it stop

One minute I’m happy

The next, I’m not

I thought I was over this

I thought I got through

I guess I thought wrong

I guess you can’t overcome

Something that’s embedded

So deep in your brain

A “chemical imbalance”

The doctors say

Well why can’t I be balanced?

Why can’t I be strong?

Why can’t I be normal?

I hope this passes

Last time it did

But it took a few months

And some slashes to the wrist

I’m ashamed beyond mention

Writing this has made me weak

It’s brought out these feelings

Please make them quit.