Us

Every day, I'd wake up with a skipping beat in my chest. I'd wake up, and see

you, and fall in love all over again. I'd fall into you. Into us.

Now I wake up with an aching gap in my chest. Every night I kiss death hoping

I'll get a sweet kiss back, die for five to seven hours, then open my eyes and sink

in the air of the living once more. My heart trembles the walking carcass I carry

and it is so fucking heavy. This carcass fixed to my soul is heavier than life itself.

I keep talking about me, but it wasn't supposed to be me. It wasn't supposed to be

me, or you for that matter. It was supposed to be us. Forever. Its not me, or you, its

us, and we, and battles, and...love.

You say you're worried, I say "About what?" You say about me. I say "You have

no idea how much you'll be worried after splitting open my ribcage and making 

me vomit up my soul. You say don't be scared, but how can I remain calm and

collected after being told the love of my life might leave me?

Break me apart, rip out my lungs and destroy my ability to breathe because you

take my breath away. Carry my exhausted torso and tear off my legs because I have 

no will to move on without you. Not a single fiber in my being will be able to

function without you. Not a single cell will do its job. My body is a temple and

its sure as hell breaking down. My body is a canvas that has been ripped from 

edge to edge, destroying a beatuiful work of art that could've been made in the

process.

Tell me, baby, what is wrong with us? What makes you so willing to break the

bond we have? The bond we share? My only problem was loving you too much.

Was caring about you too much. Was wanting to be with you and you only, and

what I have to show for it is a possibility, A possibility of me being shattered. A

possibility of relapsing into slicing my own skin for happiness. A possibility of

going to some idiot asking me, "So, Emily, how was your day?" And me replying

with, "It was extremely shitty, thanks for asking."

Break me apart, rip out my lungs because no matter how many times you destroy

me, I will reach up, grab your face, and kiss you.

You were the first light I ever touched, and the last I will ever touch, because its

not you, not me, it is we, and us.

Forever.