In vain

I am a tiny person

Inside a giant hourglass

trying to cover the  hole where the world fits in

with my with my fucking pinkie

trying to stop the sand from passing

in vain

trying to pick up the grains

that slip through my hands

This is just the last of many attempts

to ask for mercy from the time that suffocates me and takes me away from you

I confess

I tried to throw out this stupid love

I kneeled down on the toilet

and

while shivering

stuck my finger in my throat until it almost bled 

but nothing came out

I don't know if it refuses to leave even if by force

or if it's just an indication 

of the obvious illusion of that feeling. I am alone.