Venting

I smoke cigarettes now 20 years old...black lungs that have not been breathing to write in some quite while, since she learned how about the age of nine till she fell inlove

oh she's a giver and fighter yeah a fighter for love..what a lover she is, admired for it

But she can't quit her stress in her heart says she cares too much, she has a little temper but lets it out with a pool of tears and a fuss she so sensitive one thing goes wrong and its the apocalypse so she trades writing in for an old nasty habit everyday she takes a few stress releived hits, and says so what we are all gonna die some day...

We die when we live and we are dying as we pray

Black and blue box with a perfect stamp of a camel on the front...in big words that label crush and a warning note about the menthol that could not hurt...her...oh but it does

her hearts too filled with no trust she seen love crash down all her life and now she repeats flashbacks from late night fights..divorce paper view at the age of five...

Never did she realize she would get struck by it too....so she fill her lungs with smoke and hopes someday they will go on and give out...so she can stop feeling like an empty doubt...to others who discover her and let her down...every second of the day...and she tries to learn why...

yet she's still beautiful. But hates herself. Wishes she was like everyone else who has put her through hell and still let her down. It Takes the life out of you to see this young woman frown. 

Eyes so weary and tired from everynight of crying to god for help she;s feeling lost with herself...

she feels like she wants just what she cant have...she may have had it once but won't ever get it back from them

She feels used and ugly because of the people that push her to fall so fast and collides hard into imagined matter so hard like a nascar crash combustions of emotions represent the gas that fuels her pain while the car explodes as she gives her heart away and away it goes...oh we prayed her love angel would come some day...before its too late

Oh they say its never too late she will be fine everyone goes through it but each experience has a different design...some scars are harsher than others something hard to look at especially for a father or a mother...no shes no other she has reached a dead end and decided to keep on driving on in..

couple of feet ahead the sign so bright...engine running 110 miles but it feels like hses moving at the speed of light...till she loses control and can't get back on track...her head and her wheel cant get straight...its only half past eight...and no ones going to find her till the next day....oh we prayed her love angel would come some day...

Finally she stops in a dark cold ditch takes a look at the signs reading please don't let pain or anger take away what you gained from your experience...now you learn to forgive and thank the lord for the exchange of healing your heart with a beautiful gift..

So she lifted her head and stoppped shaking her hands learned to vent in a painting of words that played beautiful meanings of her inner caged thoughts she never knew she had...with only a paper and pen she learned to cope with pain...and learned to write instead of speak in words of vain...yes we prayed her love angel would come some day...yes her love angel flew by that day...