wanting more

I deserve more than sleep deprived nights 

wondering what is wrong with me

glassy pupils and puffy eyes looking hopelessly at the floor
I deserve more than walking on the grass 

walking behind the group of friends
while they walk together on the sidewalk  

i deserve more than being the last choice

or even the second choice 

or not even being a choice at all
i know i deserve so much better 

than what i get

i know i don’t deserve being kicked to the curb

left to suffer

no mercy 
But i don’t know how to show everyone 

that i deserve better 
than what they give me 

but until i learn

it’s an endless cycle