Wasn't Me

My family had moved to Kissimmee

To purchase a comfortable house.

I showed up to school sev'ral weeks before Yule

As a breeze wafted in from the South.

“Good morning,” the teacher exhorted,

“And welcome, new student in town!”

I felt so uneasy; my stomach was queasy!

I sat at the desk with a frown.

One word of advice for the reader:

New classrooms and tacos don’t blend.

For Taco Bell’s wrath fueled a dastardly draft

Like a fire searing out my rear end.

Oh, the horror I felt! The disaster! The shame!

And the stink, many times multiplied!

As my teacher said “Leave. And go pack up your things”

I just ran to the bathroom and cried.

Well, honest to God, that’s my dreadful account

The tale of a fart and a grouse

Dear readers, beware of a stench in midair

And a breeze wafting in from your South.