Wedding anxiety

I love him I want to marry him I don't want to plan this alone I don't need this stress God is testing me Loosing my job Family penny pitching Fiance is no help His family wants to help but hasn't said nothing Dad if you even want to call him that Making this all about him Dad's side of the family talking down to me Talking about me Making me feel worse for saying he wouldn't be part of my day Needing so much to get done Needing so much to go right I'm alone... I can't tell my family Friends I lost long ago I can't even talk to my fiance He avoids the serious conversations I can't back out now To much money has been spent Wedding stress Wedding anxiety This wedding needs to be over before it even starts I want this to be over I want to just sleep