I want to be in love…

I want to sit in my most boring class and get a note from you saying, “I’ve been thinking about how beautiful your smile is…” Suddenly, I’ll be interested in as to why “x” equals the square root of the variable “o”. Well, it was probably because of you.

 

I want to be up at four o’clock in the morning and you are the ONLY reason why I didn’t get any sleep that night. Not because if my severe insomnia or the fact that I have terrible nightmares; because with you, I’ll only want to dream.

 

I want to wake up to hazelnut coffee and smoked sausage and sit across from you at our cherry wood table, and wonder why we don’t do this more often.

I want to go shopping at Victoria Secret for 2 ½ hours and not have to worry about whether or not you’re uncomfortable.

I want to introduce you to my family and not have to worry about why I’m black and my family is white as snow.

I want to know that no matter what the case that you’ll come to me with open arms and say, “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

 

I want…

I want you to accept me for who I am.

 

Accept me for the lightning bolts on my forearms and thighs.

Accept me for my mood stabilizers and anti-depressants.

Accept me for my nightmares of abuse and neglect and abandonment and drug addictions.

Accept me for the days where all you’ll see are waterfalls and it’s not even raining outside.

Accept me for the days when meaningless insults and vulgarity will slip from the strawberry lemonade lips you love so much and know that I didn’t mean them and never will.

 

Accept me for my past, my present, and my future.

 

I want you to fall in love with me over and over and over again and never contemplate or wonder if loving me was ever a mistake.

I want to be in love…