What I Am/Not

In elementary school they would say:

You are a loser

You are a wierdo

You are a sight I don't want to see

You only want attention

When you scream at a bug

Deserving of the things they did to me

When they'd leave me on the playground

And I'd be alone

With only my mind for company

When I'd get up and sit by myself at lunch

And they'd act like I had no reason to be

In middle school, it's not that different:

I am quiet

I am lonely

I can't tell a friend from just someone I know

I still feel annoying

I'm still a weirdo

Too frightened to even say hello

I read like fantasy is a religion

Still left with the characters I envision

Scared of everything I can see

And people still make fun of me

In high school, it gets a little better:

I'm still quiet

I'm still kind of lonely

But I know that some people like me

I'm scared of bugs, and people, and everything

But I guess now it's ok with me

I'm not a total loser

I don't only want attention

And maybe I didn't deserve what they said to me

In college, I am much better:

I am smart

I have friends

I have goals I want to complete

I'll always be scared of bugs, people, and everything

But I guess it'll always be ok with me

I didn't deserve anything that they said

And I had every reason to feel how I felt

But I am not any of those things that they called me

I never was, and I never will