When the heart changed.

Summer sped on by and august was coming to an end. Beginning was the moment I was waiting for, the time everyone built up for me. My last time to just be free and have fun. It was my final year, it was my senior year. Boy did I have an amazing summer leading up to this moment. I had everything I needed; I had the best of friends, a close family, and a guy who I finally trusted to carry my heart. It had been a year that I was his girlfriend and we both could see our futures intertwining together. We were inseparable, and after all those little heart breaks I suffered before I finally felt safe. Because to me nothing beat those late night conversations, just talking about how great life was. Whenever we were together we would both have smiles from cheek to cheek which made our relationship unique. We were crazy, we would goof around in a book store, and have the most in depth conversations analyzing how the book is way better than the movie. Then it changed. In between those laughs my eyes failed to see the signs because maybe there weren’t any just yet. But sure enough, little by little those smiles weren’t so common, the laughs disappeared and the person I knew like the back of my hand transformed overnight into a complete stranger. He was busy, I didn’t understand, he was tired, I was lonely, he didn’t have time, not time for me. I tried to understand I convinced myself that he was just tired from work, that he just wanted to rest. The convincing didn’t help. He was gone before I had the chance to even try. It all changed the moment the mouth cannot speak what the heart feels. At this moment the only thing he brought to my heart was the most unbearable pain. A pain that the strongest medicine can never heal. A pain that the heart will never forget. It was that cold tingle that creeps unwillingly through your body, filling each part of you with the icy realization of harsh reality. The thoughts race in your mind hundreds per second; you catch yourself in a different place remembering the exact words being said at that place. Even with strongest feelings, there are no words to explain the way you feel. So I gave up. The hardest thing to do is to let the one you love go. But I did. Not by choice but by force. All that’s left of that moment are the permanent memories, lyrics to Sara Evans new song, and the love that I can’t lose for that boy.