If you want to find me, I’ll be on the

Side of the road.  Curled up and waiting for

The vultures to descend on my warm and

Peaceful body. I’d scare them off with a

Crash of a scream and return to my

Dreams lost by screaming.

If you want to find me, I’ll be sleeping

In the hollow of an old cherry tree.

I’d make friends with the squirrels and the birds,

Chirping and snickering away through the

Night and day.  Choking down seeds and nuts to

Nourish me.  Breathing in the pollen might

Prove to be dreadful for my allergies,

But that’s where I’ll be.

If you want to find me, I’ll be resting

On the sea, in a rickety old boat

With my mermaid wife-to-be. Her name will

Be a secret, not only to you but

Also to me.  Those are the places you’ll

Find me when I leave.