When i sit outside i

When i sit outside i always wonder what people think about me

I have had ever hair color in the book from  purple to pink to green, blue, red, brown, black, blonde, bleached, I've done them all and no matter the color or how much they made me happy, it seemed that others could find a problem with what i did.

Little white old southern chitin ladies shielded their eyes as if i were the devil

Children asked if i was a fairy for even if i could do this. then i did the unspeakable to most-

I shaved the side and hell but have risen and fire must have pored into the streets 

I am different. 

I like combat boots with my dresses and i enjoy having hair that looks like no other. 

I enjoy that I have made myself not look like the magazines and that I can stand up and say I am starting to truly love  myself

but for some reason thats not good enough.

Society is pulling me in so may ways i want help but crack under some pressure. 

I should be a bell and a deb because i grew up in Georgia

I should over myself because i am a girl

I should only wear t-shirts because I am bigger

I should notice the girls around me and have a nature hair color

and tattoos are manly and my skirt is to short to be modest

and i just keep thinking "I don't remember asking for options or these people to live in my closet"

I have made myself what I want and I bought the clothes i found i loved

I wear things that Mae me feel amazing and you tear that way because it doesn't fit an image you had in mind.

Hah darling oh please bless you sad little heart, I will never be what you want,

not from birth to death will myself reflect anyone but me. 

That is my happiness. 

I shine from head to toe and love ever second of your hate.

we are so used to see and judge what we don't know

i refuse to be one the millions of tall blodes that pass

i shake and shape and make myslef different to allow others to know the path is there

i grew because i took control and allowed myself to be what I wanted

i am in love because i was able to know that i could be in live with myself 

i have the our and grateful bliss of walking down the street and turning heads

people stare at what they don't understand and for me i saw let them stare

i have given the reason and will continue to