When Life Commences to be Dark

Cold. Dead. Alone. Eyes sunken Nails brittle Heart slow Life held no meaning Death held no sorrow Light held no hope Darkness held no luster To have my eyes torn open Propped up so that I could see Life was more than it led on Unfair and cruel it sometimes was He knew it too We’re not as different as it seems He saw it plain as day Awful wrong and little right But he looked up and saw the light There was a path to follow And much to do But he didn't care about the time He had to correct the corrupt Lend a hand to those beneath Speak loudly and clearly Without giving up along the way I see what he saw I needed to pick myself up The battle was not won The war was hardly over Inhale, Exhale Head up high One bite, two bites Don’t back down Life goes on But only if you let it Fix the broken Destroy the urchin He was unsure just like me But proved to all he was keen On the idea of black and white Making grey night by night He spoke to the masses And taught the people Of a world someplace nice Where everyone was equal Mississippi would watch out For the man with his head screwed on straight Who called them out on their mistakes Naming them a disgrace I had to do as he did To not accept the way it is To change, to save My life and others I spoke aloud and told someone There’s a situation unresolved I’m dying inside and out Day by day I live this way I cannot open my mouth to food Or accept the necessities of life My temperature has reached 30 My blood pressure there as well He has been there saying Let not the others control you Do not let yourself lose hope There is something left to fight for Need not the ignorant Need not the judges Need only the supporters Who hear your voice He may be denied voting Or be treated with disrespect But he will not stop speaking To better those who stand side by side I will agree to what he said To stay strong and at best To fight for me and he and her For she and him and them I will speak and I will try But I am not convincing people I am convincing myself that there is a chance A last hope I have left untouched That even when I get pushed down And my brain has yet to heal I continue to keep breathing To move on safely, not to keel He will not heed to advice To stay silent and unknown He will protest the loudest And scream ‘til it burns He will continue to go to school Continue to try to vote Continue to rally the angry Continue to serve the slighted He will oppose the Jim Crow And the segregation all have faced Striving for equality And the rights of every race I know that my life should not be separated If I want it to be fixed I must give equal reign To the logic and the sane Maybe that will bring my body back together So that I am one, not two Living not with my mortal enemy Only improving from my battles I have to fight against dear Ed The abuser I have known for so long The one who denies my food My freedom and my rights He has shown me all along How to combat Ed How to live again How to see the light Medgar Evers says to keep on going To enter the fortress of my anorexia And have the strength to carry on No matter how tough the going gets He has helped me to realize That everyone has a battle to fight That everyone can choose their path And that I, for one, choose to live. Cold. Dead. Alone. Eyes sunken Nails brittle Heart slow Life held no meaning Death held no sorrow Light held no hope Darkness held no luster Are all things of the past Not things of my future Something to remind me Not to go back I am not the others I am myself and no one else I will defend who I am For I hope to one day be Warm. Alive. Content. Eyes vibrant Heart pumping Smile growing To see life holding happiness Death holding loss Light holding possibilities Darkness holding the chance at a tomorrow For I am who I am And I will fight until the very end Just like that of Medgar Evers Who gives us the chance to live again.