Where Do I Go? What Do I Do?

The waves crash over me. Suddenly I'm lost. Lost. So lost. I try to kick my way to the surface, but there always seems to be an invisible boundary. One that I can never cross. But I suppose it's okay now. No one on the opposite side of the boundary ever seems to understand what is wrong with my brain. Somewhere in the farthest corner of my brain, I can feel a tiny flicker of hope. Hope that someday someone might understand. Most the time I feel so numb. When I don't feel numb, I feel like my mind is moving at 1000 miles an hour, and my body is moving so slow, it might as well be at a stand still. I feel like my classmates, my friends, and my family know something is wrong with me, but they won't talk to me about it, but they'll talk to eachother about it when I am not listening. Sometimes I think I need help, but then I think it's useless. The world has better things to worry about then me. I think my death is close. It was my choice, I just didn't think enough.

I guess this isn't a poem. Just my thougts. I failed again.