Why can't you see ?

There was a time when I was so quiet The silence it came from the fear of a riot Occuring so fast and caused by my blast Of words I couldn't contain For if they remained Inside me the same As they had for years on end It would cause a bend In my will to remain Within this terrain Of breathing without really living For being alive doesn't mean you haven't died Inside me remains only tears and deep pains Memories of who I once was Without him inside whispering words that reside Within me As deep as her lies That kept me from saying He hurt me it wasn't playing