Why Didn't I Learn?

I sat that night on the edge of my bed.

What had caused me this extreme pain?

Was it my fault or was it the intense

Way she made me feel her disappointment?

Would she ever be able to overcome

What I had done to her this past week?

The same things occured week after week

And I focused while sitting on my bed.

What was there to overcome

Other than this horrific pain?

There was always disappointment

Stuck in the cracks of our relationship, so intense.

Her gaze at me was so intense

With great fear in her eyes. This week

Consisted of nothing but disappointment

In her dark blue eyes. It wasn’t the bed

But me that caused her her this pain.

Although I know it was hard for her, it was nothing she couldn’t overcome.

I told her I would change my ways, overcome

By the fear of her leaving. I knew nothing more intense

Than this emotional pain.

Although hers must be more, unfortunately not only from this week,

It was on this very bed,

That I felt all of her disappointment.

There was not only the disappointment

From what happened, but the thought that she could overcome

This horrific experience and go on without me. On this bed

She slept with me. It wasn’t only her but every time it was intense.

It was her every night but the additional  every week

Caused her this great pain.

I tried to take the pain

From her but failed every time. She possessed disappointment

In herself more than me because every single week

She would believe me even though every single week I would overcome

Her disappointment in me. Although this disappointment was intense,

I would take another to the bed.

My pain came sooner than I could prepare, the bed

I once held her in, was nothing but intense

Emotional pain that I would never overcome.