Why Do I Love You?

Why do I love you?

Your affection is as deep and dark as the nighttime sky 

There is a beauty there, but it is cavernous 

You are endless

To fall into you is to never return

A chasm 

Why do I love you?

Your weight is crushing

You pull me down into your center  

Like chains of gravity clasped around my ankles

I collapse into myself

A blackhole 

Why do I love you?

Your words are too loud 

They rattle around in my brain

Like birds stuck in a heated cage of iron

Hitting into the walls of my sanity 

Threatening to crack into a million pieces 

A catastrophe 

Why do I love you?

Your logic is empty and rotted by vanity 

A gaping nothingness of disordered introductions 

Closely followed by unintelligible conclusions

A manipulator 

Why do I love you? 

Your intentions are shards of glass

You stick, poke, prod, and bite 

Sinking into my empathy with teeth 

Of razor sharp apathy 

A danger 

Why do I love you?

Like tepid water filling my lungs 

You drown me from the inside out

I try to breath 

But you stole my air 

Why do I love you?

I don’t think I do

Or I don’t think I want to 

But you have clung so tight for so long

I don’t know what exists in your absence 

Love isn’t a chasm; it should be whole

Love isn’t a blackhole; it should give as eagerly as it receives 

Love isn’t a catastrophe; it should construct something from nothing 

Love isn’t a manipulator; it should willingly guide 

Love isn’t a danger; it should harold safety 

Why do I love you?

I’ve decided 

I don’t 

Goodbye