On why I dyed my hair purple

I’d been wanting to dye my hair purple for a while.

As a little kid, I was freaking great. And what I mean by that is: 

I was that quiet kid in class that would sit in a desk next to the teacher’s.

I did my work and nobody messed with me

because I mean, come on, let’s face it: they can’t take a teacher.

I was raised the same way at home.

I would sit on the couch,

either reading or just sitting,

and I wouldn’t bother anyone.

I was responsible enough to get assigned chores,

which I greatly appreciate now,

and I never got into trouble.

I feel like I was the poster child of complacency.

In middle school,

I changed slightly.

I joined orchestra,

(met some of the greatest people that I will ever meet)

spoke up more,

and grew boobs.

For me,

middle school was one of the last times

that I was truly happy

but I also never want to go back again

(yup, I remember the awkward phases.)

During the summer before my freshmen year,

I honestly thought that high school would be the greatest time of my life.

I soon found out

that the people who did have the best years of their life in high school

also peaked there.

I was once again complacent.

I would sit quietly in class

do my work

sit in class

do my work

sit on class

do my work

and this went on for three years.

Three years of my life

(gone)

with nothing to show for them

except for the near perfect grade

on a research paper that talked about my eating disorder

(oh yeah, I was a teenage bulimic/anorexic, but that’s a different story.)

So instead of spend my senior year the same way,

I did something about it.

In preparation for this

soon-to-be adventure,

I subjected myself into a summer of isolation.

Spoke to no one

spoke to No-One

spoke to no one

and saw no one.

I felt bad at first,

speaking to no one,

but this was important to me,

this personal adventure.

Before I could go into my senior year,

I had to know who I was.

I had been wanting to dye my hair purple for a while

so I did.

I showed up to my last first day of my last year in high school,

A purple-haired girl,

not knowing who was my friend anymore

not knowing who was my friend anymore

not knowing who was my friend anymore.

I was scared,

but the second I walked into the orchestra room,

I was greeted by warm hugs,

cheerful faces,

and smiling lips that told of

how much I had been missed

how much I had been missed

how much I had been missed.

I once again re-met some of the greatest people I will ever meet.

In preparation for my so-far-wonderful-senior-year-adventure,

I’ve found out that I am

strong

and determined

and willful

and stubborn

and loved

and impulsive

and terrified of graduating high school,

but also ready at the same time,

but most of all,

in preparation for my almost-over-gone-too-soon-senior-year-adventure,

I found out

that I belonged somewhere.

I wasn’t complacent

I was out of place.

And all it took

was dyeing my hair purple

to figure it out.