Windowsill Gazes

As the teardrops splatter across my freckled-spattered cheek bones

I gaze out the rain cascading down the window pane

Looking for shapes in the puddles that slowly

Turn into rivers

I press my hand against the glass, fingertips touching,

Reaching, for the pitter-patter sound of the rain

Closing my eyes, I slowly inhale the scent of lemongrass and

Eucalyptus

I exhale

Empty, I slowly rise on crumbling legs

Taking small child-like footsteps, trying to tread lightly

As though I might damage the floor with the weight of my despair

I reach the door

My fingers slowly trace the doorknobs rough, square shape

As though it will somehow give me an answer

To my unknown question

I turn it

The light creeps in the crack in the void between the

Prison walls of my house and the earth-swallowing universe

I pull the door towards me

The ocean of light gently pushes its waves towards me

I step outside

The breath I take awakens my mind to the scent of rain and earth

I blink

I take a step with weighted footsteps and stride into the puddles

Letting the rain gently take my burden and wash it away with the rest

Of its droplets

I am free