Wisps of Me

I'm not quite here, not quite alive, not fully functional, fading into wisps of what I was once upon a yester-year. Feel like I am crashing from a glorious high that I can never have again. Hitting rock bottom and being pulled deep into the dark, cold dirt. I am alone, thrashing in a river, can't get out, drowning. The me you know is gone, floating away, downstream, as the new me takes over. She is dead, depressed, alone, addicted and a monster I try to hide. Floating on a sea of reading, gliding on an ocean of music, going to the rapids, where I can have neither to keep me sane. I need you to see me, for real, not the whole person, but the wisps of consciousness I have become inside.