Woes of the weary

I am tired Tired of reaching out to thin air Of Searching for you in all the spaces you should have been of hearing of you But never from you Of expecting more than the nothing I have always received I am tired of the distance Tired of being the only one who ever tried to lessen the gap So now unmoving I stand in the distance Silent Listening for the sound of your steps Watching for the frame of your figure Breathing for the smell of your smoke Reaching for rough hands that look like mine but feel like yours I have closed my eyes Shut my ears And suffocated Trying to erase your existence To put out the final embers of expectations Trying to burn out all that is left of us So Tired of all the things that remind me of you But still On heavy legs I stand here In the stillness of empty air Knowing That in the darkest days The final hours In the end of all there is you will never come